These are strange times in Roslyn. Having survived a vicious and well-coordinated financial attack on our schools, it appears we as a community are still fragmented. The negative effects of our community wound persist, too often an "us against them" philosophy prevails, and the different priorities of different groups play out, often with anger and insult. We all are sitting in the middle of a difficult situation, and perspective is perhaps the most difficult quality to hold onto, but perhaps also the most crucial. For the sake of Roslyn as a whole, let's just try and get an overview. See if you can find yourself in one of these groups. Who are we?

There is one group, parents, who want to see the schools offer their children the same opportunities that have been offered in previous years to Roslyn students. In a world in which college applicants are now screened as much for their "leadership" and "roundedness" as they are for their scholastics, this group knows not only the importance of a well-rounded life to the emotional health of their kids, but also to their eventual success.

There is another group, often older, a group of people who have lived here for many years, seen incredible increases in the value of their homes, and equally incredible changes in their taxes. Some of these people's budgets are greatly "taxed" by these taxes. They quip, "I couldn't afford to buy my home now," but their concerns are serious. Many of them no longer have kids in the schools, and some are not happy about having to support those schools.

Then there is another group of people, who are very well off financially, have paid top dollar for their homes here, who want the top quality school experience for their kids that drove them to purchase homes in Roslyn in the first place, and who now may feel violated that circumstances totally beyond their control are determining the educational future of their children.

Another group is just plain mad - still angry about the Tassone/Gluckin fallout - and now looks at every expense of the school district as inflated and misdirected. Most of us will never know exactly how much of what happened back then was well-planned thievery within a good system, and how much of it was actually due to lax record-keeping and poor procedures that still continue, but those who have allowed anger to take control feel obsessively distrustful about now watching every penny.

Everyone has an honest gripe. And if everyone has actually read the previous information with an open mind, maybe we all realize that our neighbor is not our enemy, but just someone else in pain - maybe a different pain than ours - but all in pain one way or another.

Unfortunately, some members of the above groups have been destructive in their comments. It is not helpful when some members of the very well-to-do group tell the rest of us "if you can't afford the taxes, why don't you move out?" Nor is it helpful when a website purporting to "represent" Roslyn taxpayers turns out to be someone's self-indulgent mud-slinging free-for-all which misrepresents information, personally insults individuals (by name) who have knocked themselves out for the benefit of the community, while not naming the person behind the website. Accusations do no one any good. Do any of us really want this polarization undermining our community?

So what now? We have a new budget ready for voting. No one is totally happy. The board, bombarded with all the emotions of all the above groups, has tried to run a course, hopefully not directed by their own prejudices but by the community's various needs. But there is only so much magic they can perform. We are still in the reigns of Tassone-negotiated contracts, mandated state increases, and certain economic realities that are not pleasant. Unfortunately, in this latest budget, the kids do lose - somehow this last set of cuts did bite into the day-to-day life of children, probably to save us each pennies a day, which is a true shame.

But, no matter how much we may be disappointed in it, we must support this budget. Please understand that if we go to contingency, it is our kids who will lose everything, and we will still be paying practically the same high taxes anyway. We are stuck, like it or not, with Tassone's contract that lives on, state mandates, and yes, terribly high taxes. Maybe those Roslynites feeling the pinch can neutralize their own upset by directing their thoughts to the present very high value of their home. The two are flip sides of the same coin. Maybe those among us who have been blessed with great financial success can choose to start an endowment or fund to subsidize some of the things that have already been taken from our schoolchildren. Maybe we can try to once again create a kinder and gentler community, and concentrate more on empathizing with those who are of a different mindset.

Whatever we do has a domino effect. Anger and fighting breeds the same. Empathy is a healer that can temper anger, and start to unspiral the vicious circle we have gotten ourselves into. Please let's realize that we are all on the same side. No one here hates kids. Some of us are just more out of control than others. Those individuals who are caught up in the self-indulgence of accusation and name-calling may be ignored, and not given any more power by response. I do believe better days are coming. We all want the Roslyn community and our school district to be a positive model for others. Use your own perspective and common sense. Dig deep and vote from the heart. Don't vote "angry." Please focus on a better future, and let's move on positively.

Dr. Elizabeth Spicer