When should we give an opinion?

When should we accept an opinion?

Opinions should be given artfully and tactfully.

Knowing the person who has requested your opinion is truly important. Some folks ask for your insight and advice without really wanting it. They just want to confirm their own method of handling a situation.

In the play Art, which Lorraine and I saw at the Arena Players Second Stage, a character spends an exorbitant amount on a painting. He shows it to his two best friends and asks their opinion of the artwork he has just purchased. Supposedly, the artwork was done by a fashionable, contemporary painter. To the audience it appears just a blank white canvas, 4-feet by 5-feet.

One best friend laughs and ridicules the painting and the absurdity of spending so much money on a blank canvas. This irritates and angers the purchaser. Their friendship is almost destroyed by so strong an opinion.

When the second friend sees the turmoil between his two best buddies, he equivocates and fudges his opinion. The purchaser should never have asked his two friends for an opinion. He should have had enough confidence and conviction in his own taste, feeling and decision to not require the opinion of his comrades to bolster his ego.

On the other hand, his two chums should have looked into his rabid eyes and realized that anything short of complete, blind appreciation of his prize painting would be hurtful. They soon began quibbling over their personal lives, having nothing to do with the painting.

Opinions given or received are risky business!

When your wife asks you to comment on that expensive new dress she has just bought, think at least twice.

Too much honesty or too much deceit can break apart long-held friendships. In this political climate of 2008, blurting out strong, personal opinions can sever ties of friends and family members.

Opinions on one specific issue can become a catalyst for opening personal long-festering sores.

Be careful!