Oct. 13 is the day of my 70th birthday.

Being born on Friday, the 13th in the middle of the world's greatest Depression does not auger well for the newborn.

I do not remember a lot of depressed men selling apples on the street corner or Wall Street tycoons jumping out of buildings. I was too young.

When it is your birthday, who sends you birthday cards?

* All of my children sent me birthday cards.

* All my grandchildren have sent me birthday cards.

* My wife Lorraine has sent me a birthday card.

* My best friend Bernie has sent me a birthday card.

* Some wonderful neighbors have sent me birthday cards.

Cards! (Lottie and Mo Levy and Alice and Mort Steinberg)

* My editor Denise Nash sent me a birthday card.

* My insurance agent has sent me a birthday card.

* Foxwoods and Mohegan Sun sent me a birthday card.

* My two stockbrokers have sent me birthday cards.

* The Maine Maid Inn has sent me a birthday card.

* My sisters and brothers-in-laws have sent me a birthday card.

* My dental school classmates Gary and Donnie sent me birthday cards.

* My sister sent me a birthday card.

* Barbara Lo Chant and the Hamlet Happenings staff sent me a birthday card.

* My son's mother-in-law has sent me a birthday card.

* The restaurant Portofino on 1st Avenue in Manhattan sent me a birthday card.

I am a Libra according to the astrological charts. Something about a set of scales and me being sure to weigh all the possibilities. I hate to argue with the astrologers but Stanley Greenberg, me, does not consider all possibilities - rash as well as quick to speak and act are my hallmarks.

Speaking of hallmarks, I wish to thank the Hallmark Company for thinking up all those cute and not-so-cute sayings on the birthday cards I received.

I have in my own mind, pronounced all those beautiful thoughts as gospel and declared myself truly worthy of all the adulation. Reaching the Biblical "three score and ten" (70 years) is not something to be sneezed at.

I hereby profusely thank all the good wishers and all those who forgot to send a birthday card. Next year those who forgot might want to atone, so please mark the date of Oct. 13 on your 2005 calendar.

Question: Should the column now be called "Over 70 and Getting Younger?" Please answer to Shgreenbug@aol.com.