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Obituary: Alice Irwin Barnes

Friends Grad Leaves Legacy For Best Friends

Alice Irwin Barnes, who went to high school at Friends Academy in Locust Valley, passed away in November with her family at her side. She was 50.

A rare and aggressive carcinoid sarcoma was revealed during an unrelated surgery, and despite the best efforts of the excellent doctors at Memorial Sloan Kettering, it was a short battle.

But the sorrow of Alice’s passing is tempered by the good she was able to do for those she left behind. “Alice was always taking care of other people, and never herself,” said her husband, George Barnes. “Even at the end, she was always very positive.”

He writes: Alice to the end continued to think about others more than herself.  She had us send direct donations to an organization called Home for Good Dog Rescue, where we’d adopted our dog, Cubby, this past May.

Shortly after Alice died, I got a call from a woman named Toni Ann Turco, founder and director at Home for Good Dog Rescue, who said she had received many phone calls from people who wanted to donate in Alice’s memory.  She was so grateful because they work on almost no budget, and this meant so much to them.

I told her about how Cubby had been Alice’s protector during her illness, and how he had cuddled with her on the couch when she was in pain, or sat by the couch and wouldn’t leave her side if she couldn’t have him on the couch.  I had assumed, and told her as much, that Cubby had come from a family in Georgia that must have treated him well and allowed him on the furniture because within a day of joining our family we found him sprawled out on the love seat in the family room sound asleep.

She told me it was just the opposite—that Cubby was about a day away from being euthanized when HFGDR arrived in Georgia and got him to a foster home.  At the time, he had virtually no fur on his lower torso, was malnourished, and had a horrible skin rash. He didn’t trust anyone (easily understood) and would cower in fear if anyone came near him.

Alice always felt that Cubby brought a breath of life into the house that was missing after we lost Becky, and felt there was a reason we found Cubby and brought him home.

Ella, Cait and I believe that the reason was to look after Alice while she was sick and bring her love and companionship when she was home alone and needed it more than ever.

Last night Toni Ann called to say that at Home For Good Dogs Rescue recent capital fundraising dinner, she told everyone Cubby’s story and how he helped Alice through her illness.  She said that by the time she was done, she was in tears, as was the rest of the room.

This past Monday, she got a phone call. A woman who had been at the event and her husband had decided to make a donation of $10,000 in Alice’s memory.  HFGDR is in the process of moving to a new office, and one of the rooms will be dedicated in Alice’s memory, along with a plaque bearing her name and Cubby’s, and the photo of our family (taken the day we adopted Cubby).

It was a shock to say the least, and as Ella put it, “it’s hard to believe that one stray dog from Georgia coming into our lives could change the world for Mom and for future dogs everywhere . . . he was a true blessing in disguise.”

At latest count, Alice’s request had brought in more than $13,000 for the organization’s dog rescue and rehabilitation efforts.

Born in Hempstead and raised in Levittown, Alice lost her own mother at the age of 10. After graduating from Friends Academy in 1981, she earned two bachelor’s degrees, one in political science and one in philosophy, from the University of Rochester. She and her family moved to Verona, NJ in 1990. She was an instructor for Gallagher Associates in Wayne, NJ, and previously worked at the Daily News Record of Fairchild Publications in Manhattan.  

She was the wife of George F. Barnes; mother of Ella and Caitlin, and the stepdaughter of Carol Irwin. She is also survived by her sister, Eileen Gill and her husband, Thomas; her brother, Christopher Irwin and his wife, Carol; her brother-in-law, Carl Barnes and his wife, Barbara Heffner, and her brother-in-law, Marc Alan; her godson, Brian Gill, and her nephews, Robert Barnes, Thomas Irwin, Gerard Irwin and Keith Ellwood.

In lieu of flowers, donations to the Home for Good Dog Rescue, P.O. Box 324, Summit, N.J. 07902, www.homeforgooddogs.org—or any local dog shelter—would be appreciated.

News

When Danielle Taylor decided to compete in a six-mile civilian military obstacle course last September, she knew two things: she did not want to do it alone and she wanted the challenge to have a purpose. She found a partner in Jeannine DelPozzo and a worthwhile cause in the Morgan Center.

 

Both Taylor and DelPozzo are entrepreneurs; Taylor, of Bish Bash Books in Oyster Bay and DelPozzo of DelPozzo Foods, in East Norwich. Each have a history of using their businesses to support local charities. Bish Bash Books used the iPad give back program to support at-risk children while DelPozzo Foods has supported Island Harvest in their efforts to combat hunger.

Our experience of 9/11 has changed; today it is seen as part of a journey and not an isolated event. On Wednesday, Sept. 10, President Barack Obama spoke to the nation saying the battle against terrorism is ongoing. 

 

That awareness that we had gone through the experience of the fall of the Twin Towers and had rebounded, but the danger is not over, and the battle is still to be won was repeated by Senator Carl Marcellino at the Day of Commemoration at the Oyster Bay 9/11 Memorial Garden on the Western Waterfront on Thursday evening.


Sports

Former football coach and NFL player Bill Curry recently brought a wealth of experience, knowledge and history to a wide audience of student-athletes and coaches at Hofstra University for a lesson on diversity, tolerance and respect in high school athletics.

 

Director of the NYS PHSAA Sportsmanship Committee and Manhasset High School Athletic Director Jim Amen Jr. established the summit and invited Curry as keynote speaker.

Amen Jr. and Section VIII Executive Director Nina Van Erk introduced Curry to a crowd representing more than 37 local high schools.

Hard work paid off for local athletes Christine Grippo of Locust Valley, Kelly Pickard of Oyster Bay, Bernadette Winnubst of Locust Valley, Steven Quigley of Bayville, Catherine Soler of Oyster Bay, Maria Elinger of Oyster Bay, and Armand D’Amato of Oyster Bay Cove, each of whom won awards in a field of some of the best triathletes from all of Long Island and beyond in the 27th annual Runner’s Edge - Town of Oyster Bay Triathlon, held in and around Oyster Bay’s Theodore Roosevelt Memorial Park on Saturday morning, Aug. 23.

Grippo earned top honors in the women’s 30-34 age group with a time of 1 hour, 17 minutes, 36 seconds. Pickard (1:17:39) scored first among the women in the 35-39 age group. Winnubst scored in 1:38:48 to earn third place honors in the Masters Athena Weight Division. Quigley earned the second place award in the Masters Clydesdale Weight Division in 1:23:23. Soler (1:29:12) scored 5th among the women in the 20-24 age group. Ehlinger (1:39:23) was the 4th place award winner in the women’s 55-59 age group. D’Amato (1:42:44) earned top honors in the 70-74 age group.


Calendar

MSA Party - September 17

West Shore Rd. Update - September 18

Harbor Beach Cleanup - September 20


Columns

1959: The Year The Music Stopped Playing
Written by Michael A. Miller, mmillercolumn@gmail.com

The Eccentric Heiress Of ‘Empty Mansions’
Written by Mike Barry, MFBarry@optonline.net

Yellow Margarine And A Pitch For The Ages
Written by Michael A. Miller, mmillercolumn@gmail.com