Back by popular demand, the Garden City Community Council on Substance Abuse and Violence Prevention presented guest speaker David Wilmes March 2 in the high school cafeteria.

One of Wilmes' goals for the community is to make prevention as contagious as substance abuse, a disease that can have its risks cut short with early detection, prevention and/or intervention. He said that parents must come together as a community and present a united stand against substance abuse.

"It's not just our families that have to struggle with this, it's our entire community," Wilmes, who has 30 years experience in the fields of prevention and early intervention, said.

Wilmes is the director of services for St. Paul Youth Services in St. Paul, MN and is a featured presenter and trainer at conferences and workshops throughout North America. He has authored numerous books, including Parenting for Prevention, which has sold over 250,000 copies. He has also been featured as a prevention expert in numerous local and national media, including USA Today, CBS Morning News, and ABC's Good Morning America.

Wilmes spoke about parents who allow their children to participate in underage drinking, stating that two-thirds of tenth-grade parents and one-third of seventh and eighth-grade parents allow their children some use of alcohol in some situations. The parents' reasoning for allowing their underage children to use alcohol includes cultural, ritual, as well as adult peer pressure.

Wilmes' research revealed that when parents said no to alcohol or other drug use, 19 percent of kids still engaged in lying or some other form of anti-social behavior. However, when parents allowed some use of alcohol, it jumped up to 40 percent, meaning kids are twice as likely to engage in anti-social behavior, according to Wilmes.

Parents must create an environment for their children where they can balance work and play, social and alone time and family time and time with friends, he said. "It is important that kids learn how to make decisions, but it is essential that kids make age-appropriate decisions. Allowing kids to choose to break the law simply doesn't teach them how to avoid the consequences," Wilmes noted.

"We as a culture are exposing our kids to more and more dangerous options at a younger age, with less family connectiveness, less supervision and less responsiveness, and then we are amazed that it creates casualties," he continued. Parents have the right to ask their children when and where they are attending social functions, how they can be reached, who the adult in charge will be, who they will be with, what they will be doing...what others will be doing and when they will be coming home.

One resident asked whether or not a teen community center could be effective. Wilmes said that research has shown that teen centers have a tendency to develop into high-risk places or situations for negative consequences. "We live in a culture where our kids are overextended," he said. "The other thing about the teen center is that they are really expensive and they haven't been proven to be that successful."

Carol Kane, a mother of four daughters ages 10, 8, 6 and 18 months, said, "I think I learned that it is a lot more difficult to be a parent than I thought it would be." Kane doesn't believe that one meeting could fully prepare a parent, but since attending, she is a little more aware of what to look for and what to ask her children as they enter adolescence.

After attending Wilmes' discussion, Christine Coners said she is a more confident parent. She has four children, ages 18, 16, 12 and 10. Pam Mirabella said the most important aspect of Wilmes' discussion was that parents must be persistent with their children. Mirabella has two children, ages 10 and 8.