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Letter: The Suicide Conversation

So much has already been said about Robin Williams’ death by suicide that there really isn’t much left to say.

While shining a light on the serious issues of substance abuse, mental illness and suicide helps to remove the stigma attached, journalists and radio and TV personalities have an obligation to their readers, viewers, etc. to report the news in a responsible way. Unfortunately, this does not always happen.

I heard a DJ on the radio say that he heard that the people who were close to Robin Williams are now saying that warning signs of suicide were there. The DJ then went on to ask the question, “why didn’t those people get him some help?”

It is public knowledge that Robin Williams was seeking help for both his addiction and his severe depression.

However, “help” doesn’t fix the problem overnight or miraculously make a person feel instantaneously good again. “Help” requires hard work over a period of time.

Sometimes when a person is in such a depressed state, they start to feel hopeless, which means that they don’t believe there is any hope that things will ever get better.

At that point, they may decide that asking for or accepting further “help” will not do any good. They just want to do something that will end the pain.

Another problem with that question is that it implies that those closest to Robin Williams are somehow to blame for what happened. People who are bereaved by suicide feel a variety of emotions, guilt being one of the strongest ones.

The truth is that none of us, no matter how much we think we matter or how influential we think we are, have enough power to cause another person to take his or her life.

However, not being able to comprehend exactly what the person who died by suicide was feeling, leaves those closest to them wondering what they could have done differently to prevent the death by suicide. Questions like this only add to the guilt those bereaved by suicide already feel.

I realize that what this DJ said was in no way meant to be accusatory or hurtful to those closest to Robin Williams. I bring it up simply to point out that the issue of suicide is not a simple one and our choice of words when someone dies by suicide is very important.  

The most important message from this tragedy is that “help” is available. The first step is knowing when and where to find the help.

A good way to begin the helping process is to reach out to Long Island Crisis Center’s 24/7 hotline at 516-679-1111. It is free, anonymous and confidential. Or call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 if you’re outside the Long Island area.  

There is no need to wait until you get to the point where you feel hopeless. There is no need for family or friends to feel hopeless about getting help for someone they care about.

Theresa Buhse

Associate Executive Director

Long Island Crisis Center

News

More than 2,000 Long Islanders enjoyed the festivities at Captree State Park as Assemblyman Joseph Saladino hosted the ninth annual Marine and Outdoor Recreation Expo on Sept. 15.

Attendees learned about sustainable sources of energy as well as ways to protect the planet, especially the island’s marine environment. There were demonstrations in camping, boating, water safety, renewable energy, wildlife and environmental education, fly fishing, arts and crafts, face painting, clowns, touch tanks, ballon animals and plenty of rock and roll.

The founders of the popular Facebook group “Massapequa Moms,” a ‘virtual living room with 6,700 people,’ are leveraging their social media power to create a new discount loyalty card good all over Long Island—including, they hope, in Farmingdale.

With a hugely popular Facebook community, co-founders Dawn Boyle Kostakis and Stephanie Hartman wanted to “figure out a way that we could help the consumer and the business owner at the same time; keeping commerce going, keeping it all local and having the people get a little bang for their buck,” said Kostakis. They wanted to serve more than just Massapequa, too, and the Long Island Loyalty card was born.


Sports

Farmingdale squeaks by Massapequa

The rivalry between the Farmingdale Dalers and the Massapequa Chiefs is a big one. So big that the school districts and the Nassau County Police Department had to take extra precautions to maintain security. Not everyone who wanted to see this game at Masspequa High School were allowed access to the game. In the past, there was some unruly behavior. So, if you were from Farmingdale you parked on the right side of the school and from Massapequa you were on the left. The stands on both side were full and hundreds standing along the fence to watch this game.

The Chiefs would score first in the first quarter with a 9-yard run by Paul Dilena for a touchdown. The Dalers had some problems moving the ball down field until Daler Danny Mckeon intercepted a pass and ran it back into the Chiefs side of the field. This would set up a 6-yard run for a touchdown for Michael Outing who had 19 carries for 84 yards. With the score tied 7-7, Zach Kolodny kicked a 22-yard field goal to put the Dalers up 10-7 shortly before  halftime and the heavy rain that followed.

Town sports shifts to hockey

It’s almost time to hit the ice again.

The Town of Oyster Bay Youth Ice Hockey Program will hold its registration on Monday, Oct. 6 and Wednesday, Oct. 8, from 6 to 9 p.m. on both nights. Registration takes place at the Town of Oyster Bay Ice Skating Center in Bethpage.

“The Youth Ice Hockey Program provides youngsters, ages three to 13, with the opportunity to hone their skating and hockey skills under the guidance of ice hockey coaches,” Councilman Joe Pinto stated. “The highly regarded program has earned it recognition by the NHL, which has partnered with the Town to promote hockey programming and youth enrichment through its ‘Hockey is For Everyone’ initiative.”


Calendar

Junior Varsity Football At Baldwin High School

Saturday, September 27

Girls Varsity Tennis At Malverne High School

Tuesday, September 30

Boys Varsity Volleyball Versus Massapequa High School

Wednesday, October 1



Columns

1959: The Year The Music Stopped Playing
Written by Michael A. Miller, mmillercolumn@gmail.com

The Eccentric Heiress Of ‘Empty Mansions’
Written by Mike Barry, MFBarry@optonline.net

Yellow Margarine And A Pitch For The Ages
Written by Michael A. Miller, mmillercolumn@gmail.com