Not-for-profits on Long Island are "event" driven. By that I mean private sector funding for not-for-profits is derived from dinners, luncheons, receptions and golf outings. A tremendous amount of time goes into the development of these events. Committees meet, invitations are printed, letters go out and phone calls are made, all with the hope that dollars will flow into the organization holding the event.

Beyond the committee effort, boards of not-for-profits and paid staffs are constantly looking for honorees. Honorees are the focus for each happening. The hope is that the honorees' business associates and friends will turn out in large numbers to support the occasion. All of this is positive, because the not-for-profits truly help Long Islanders in need.

Trying to calculate the number of such events held each year, I estimate that there are thousands on Long Island. And I attend 75 or more each year in the company of my wife. That figure does not include the number of political receptions and dinners which I also do in the course of a year.

All of this leads me to two points for this piece. First, I have to wonder if the events make the most sense in fund raising. My son Ken, the director of development at a Long Island College, feels that there is a better way. At the risk of offending many fine catering establishments and golf courses, we feel that more emphasis should be placed on giving because of the organizations' objectives and not showing up at an event. Who can argue with defeating cancer, promoting greater tolerance or another worthwhile cause? But when you consider that some dinner tickets have reached $500, with most being over $200, you have to ask how much of the money goes into paying for the banquet and how much ends up helping the not-for-profit achieve its objectives?

The next point relates to what I call my "tea bag appearances" at some events. After the third event of the week, I have to admit a degree of boredom. Programs at some events are too long. Guests fidget with their food. Some are even rude¬talking so loudly during programs that it is embarrassing. That is where the "tea bag appearances" come in. When I tell a friend at a reception that Phoebe and I are doing a "tea bag," a quizzical look comes across their face until I define the appearance. A tea bag drops into the cup, adds color, flavor and fragrance¬then it leaves the cup. It is only in the tea cup for a few minutes. With a smile, my "tea bag appearances" do the same, I hope. We drop in, and leave.

In spite of my misgivings about too many events on Long Island, I will still show up to help out. Too many not-for-profits need our help, and until someone comes up with another way to raise funds, I will continue to show up and do my "tea bag appearances."